facebook landscaping, a top ten list

did you know that facebook will let you hide people from your news feed? of all of the things technology has come up with THIS is my favorite. i don't want to remove them from my friends (i'm not heartless) i just don't want to read their statuses~ here are a few that are guaranteed to get the boot!

1. facebook eeyore... you know who i mean. they're always sick. something terrible has happened to them everyday. they post sad, depressed posts every. single. day... we all have rough patches. but if every day is one, see a therapist. if only there was a way to "hide" them in real life...

2. the vague- booker... they post things like "i'm so devastated. i can't believe this is happening." and then not log in for three days. all of their friends are worried and asking if they are ok with no response.

3. the "i will post something controversial and end with i don't want to discuss it". i often post things that i know will get a lively debate going. i like a good debate. if you don't want one, keep your posts neutral!

4. the ever-changing relationship status... they're married, they're single, it's complicated, they're in a relationship, all in the same day!

5. the gamer. every status is about how they need a cow for their farm or something. no thanks.

6. the "texter". example? "so excited 2 B goin 2 movie w/ my frds! C U l8R" ... you have a full keyboard. use it.

7. the "i have no boundaries" poster... they may be telling you about their recent marital dispute, their kid's vomit or posting a pic of their afterbirth. their life is an open book and they can't wait to tell you about it!

8. the youtuber. no statuses, only youtube videos. all day, every day.

9. the "i forget facebook is public" poster. "i'm bout to smoke a joint!" "i drove home so trashed last night!" it should be "i never hope to get a job!"

10. anything i have to repost. let me just clear it up once and for all. i support breast cancer, autism, depression, and any other disease research. i love Jesus, America, freedom, soldiers and everyone else. except for people who post statuses that i've mentioned here.