Monday, May 3, 2010

nickjr is out to get me.... and YOU

i know, i know, Two posts in one day! why do i have so much spare time on my hands? because Yo Gabba Gabba is on and i'm neglecting my house! that's why! i have a few gripes to express towards nickjr though, and playhouse disney if anyone is counting.

TOP TEN WAYS CHILDREN'S PROGRAMMING IS TRYING TO SABOTAGE ME!

10. the shows are approximately 18 minutes long. have you ever tried to shower in 18 minutes when you have as much hair as i do? sorry theMr, you just have to get used to the furry legs. it's miracle i can shower at all.

9. some kid on tv just showed my kids how to play the recorder with their nose. thank you so much! i'm always looking for new ways they can spread their snot around a little more!



8. the "catchy" tunes, oh the tunes.... if you are at the zoo among hundreds of strangers and the tram pulls up and at least twenty other parents all start singing the "choo choo soul" song to their kids that should tell you something. true story, this happened to a friend of mine. we should not know these songs so well.
the phone, the phone is ringing....

7. the little "projects" between shows. you know the ones. the easy ones you can do with your child involving simple household items such as 37 Popsicle sticks, 14 colors of felt and a hot glue gun. and they make them seem super easy and fun so that your kid is nagging you all day about doing it. hey kids- our project for the day is making sure the baby gets her diaper changed at a reasonable interval!

6. the commercials. first of all, i'd prefer they don't have commercials. as if my kids need any reminder that are lots of toys they still don't have! but they also show ones directed at the parents. so now my kids want us to buy a snuggie, some tampax and one of those giant cupcake baking pans. not to mention dora nagging us to fill out our census. dora, are you even here legally?



5. the many languages. now i know that good mothers desire their children to by bilingual. but as a mother of a child with a significant speech delay, i'd rather just focus on english. can someone tell me why my toddler needs to know japanese?

4. the repetition of the same five episodes over and over and over.... really. if i see mickey mouse try to get that sheep out of the tree one more time...why is there a sheep in a tree anyway?



3. where are the parents in all these shows? why are max and ruby always unsupervised? and the backyardigans? they play outside all day long with no supervision.



2. the political correctness. now i know this one will probably get me in trouble but it drives me crazy. there is nothing PC about me at all. the constant messages of tolerance and whatnot annoy me to no end. do i want my children to love everyone, regardless of differences or lifestyle choices? yes. do also want them to stand up for truth and morality in a world of "everything goes"? absolutely. i'll handle the character development, nickelodean. thanks anyway.

1. this preschool programming is on 24/7. this is really a blessing and a curse. on one hand, it's always there. on the other hand, it's always there. so you can never (honestly) say "sorry, there's no show on right now!"
you just have to turn it off. and go outside. where you can do a big project involving planting your very own earth friendly garden of organic vegetables after finishing your census form.

2 comments:

BuckeyeNP said...

hilarious -- where ARE Max & Ruby's mom and dad??!? The worst for us, the projects you mentioned. The lates was the felt cut out of Rin tu from Kailan, which looked like it would have only taken approximately 8 to 10 hours to create. This is also how I got sucked into organizing a Trike a Thon (although St judes is a great cause, no question about it!) -- Claire thought Dora *was actually going to attend* the Trike A thon. After the whole thing was planned i said, oh ok, you do realize Dora can't come to everyone's trike a thon, right? She was so disappointed. Dang nickjr people!!

Susan said...

Amen, Amen, Amen!!!! I feel the same way about all of these points you made! My BFF and I are always wondering where are max & Ruby's parents. She told me that she joined a group on FB the other day called "Where are Max and Ruby's parents?" Hahaa! Here's a link if you want to check it out! http://www.facebook.com/pages/WHERE-IN-THE-HELL-ARE-MAX-RUBYS-PARENTS-/186936643611
I know what you mean about the songs too... What's gonna work??? TEAM WORK!! lol! =P
I rely on Nick Jr. SO much that when our cable provider dropped it as one of the channels included in the package we have, I had to extend our package so we could get it again. Let me tell you... Those were a Loooong 3 days w/ NO Nick Jr.!!! My 2 yo even knows how to say I wanna watch "Joooner" peeeze!! =)
The shows annoy me SO much, but at the same time I would get NOTHING done during the day if we didn't have it.